Justin Bieber meeting with an unidentified emissary of some sort of strange marijuana commune (judging from the flag in the background)
Sometimes you see something on the internet that you know is going to be fucking crazy and you read it anyway out of sheer curiosity. This insane Mark David Chapmen-sque “open letter” was written by CNN contributor Cathleen Falsani (who also has a WordPress blog herself). Appearently Ms. Falsani, who is also a biographer of Bieber is deathly afraid that pop star Justin Bieber is falling in with the wrong crowd/book sales:
Chickity check yo self before you wreck yo self ~ Ice Cube
Opening up with an Ice Cube lyric? Is that what they are teaching at the seminary these days? Goddamned Lutherans…
Dear Justin, Please consider this a well-being check from someone who genuinely cares about you: Me.
Let me begin by saying that I am for you. I have studied you and your career since you stepped into the public spotlight as an adolescent. You are a gift to the world – to your family, your friends and your tens of millions of devoted fans.
“Lock your windows lock your doors…..”
Sweetheart, here’s the thing (and this is an “and,” not a “but”): I’m worried about you. It’s not that you smoke pot (or anything else). It’s what that choice and behavior means.
That he wanted to get high?
Like so many of your admirers, I have celebrated your successes, danced to your music, sung along with you in the car, prayed with you when you’ve publicly asked us to join you in lifting up the victims of cataclysm and despair, and prayed for you – for your protection and health, direction and inspiration.
I know you are keenly aware of the many gifts you’ve been given and who bestowed them on you. And I know you understand that to whom much is given, much is expected and required.
And this is relevant to Bieber smoking pot how exactly?
With a perspective and sense of responsibility far beyond your years, throughout your public life thus far you have articulated beautifully and clearly your gratitude for the extraordinary favor and experiences you have had and continue to have as the most famous teenager on the planet.
“I got money in my hands that I’d really like to blow/Swag swag swag, on you”
And you have given thanks publicly and consistently to your supporters, the team that manages your business, mentors, creative partners, and your God.
And apparently his local weed deliver service in Newport as well
You regularly encourage your fans – young and old – to follow your lead and recognize the blessings in their own lives, to “pay it forward,” give back, and try to change the world for the better.
Ahh yes the Beliebers, the gentle souls who hurled racial epithets at the head of a charity for daring to criticize the pop idol….
Justin, as has been your intention, you have been a positive influence on countless children and young people around the globe. And I believe that you will continue to be a force of light and joy as long as you don’t choose to ignore the divine GPS located in your heart of hearts.
I must have missed Jesus mentioning the internal Garmin of the soul in his sermon on the mount. Perhaps it didn’t make it into the King James version.
Few of us, who know you only through your public persona, can fathom the pressures of superstardom that you live with every day.
Millions of dollars, blowjobs on demand, and really high grade pot at his disposal. Life sounds HARD.
Last year you reached a milestone when you turned 18. You are living in a liminal state, standing at the threshold between childhood and adulthood, still more boy than man.
….and ineligible for an Amber Alert should someone kidnap you….(RUN JUSTIN!!!)
Times of transition and change are difficult for anyone, never mind someone whose every move in public is chronicled by relentless paparazzi and other members of the media. You must be gentle with yourself as you navigate these new waters, but you also must be diligent to guard your heart and mind more now than ever.
Whether you’ve partaken of the “sacred herb” just once or burn more cabbage than Tommy Chong at a Furthur show is not the issue that most concerns me.
How old are you lady? Your drug parlance is more dated than Joe Friday’s.
It’s the decision to light a spliff or one-hitter or cigarette or whatever it was in that Newport Beach hotel room last week where folks were snapping pictures with their smartphones that troubles me.
Translation: GODDAMMIT JUSTIN DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT THIS IS GOING TO DO FOR BOOK SALES? YOU THINK SOCCER MOM’S IN LA JOLLA ARE GOING TO BUY THEIR LITTLE BRATS A BOOK ABOUT SOME DRUGGED OUT LITTLE CORY FELDMAN REDUX?
What you do and say echoes around the world. Your very young fans watch and listen to you carefully. When they see images of you with a butt or blunt in your hand or waiting for a friend to pour you a glass of vodka, the message they receive is inconsistent and confusing.
He’s also a fucking adult human and not a cartoon character preserved in adolescence for his entire existence. Somehow I think his fans recognize this despite your patronization.
I can’t imagine that was your intention, if you gave much thought at all to what you were doing before you chose to do it, but that’s the reality.
Is it fair that you should need to consider millions of other people before you decide how to spend an evening with friends? Probably not. But that is the life you have chosen (or that, perhaps at least, in part, was chosen for you by others) and you have a responsibility to act accordingly.
Yes in this age of legalized torture, insane Wall Street gambling, and the complete abandonment of our country’s working class by the leaders of our society it is our pop stars that must be held accountable for setting a bad example by daring to smoke weed in private. HOW DARE THEY.
You do have the choice to disregard your responsibilities. But you don’t have the choice to avoid the consequences of your actions. Everybody makes mistakes, and all of us behave in ways that are not our highest and best selves. None of us is defined by our worst moments. That’s what grace – and I know you understand what grace is – is all about.
I seemed to have forgotten the people that Bieber assaulted while high, the car that he crashed while drunk, and the racist epithets that he hurled on stage when he was too fucked up to perform. Wait none of that happened? Well then what are these “mistakes” that Falsani is blabering on about?
In the past, when you’ve made choices that maybe weren’t the best, you have owned them, apologized, made amends and self-corrected. As you lean farther into young adulthood, I pray that you will continue to do so.
You know better than anyone exactly what temptations and opportunities celebrity brings. And I know you know well the cautionary tales of far too many child celebrities who have reached the threshold in which you now stand and made terrible choices that have led to their destruction. I don’t believe that’s how your story is meant to end. But it could be if you are reckless and lose sight of true north.
“True North”= Cash Money from the key “conservo-mommy blogger” music purchaser demographic
Remember who you are, Justin. Remember who you were created to be. A city on a hill. Salt and light.
Smoke pot again and god is going to turn your ass into a pillar of salt like Lot’s Wife Biebs
Don’t forget that you are loved precisely for who you are: Justin Drew Bieber, precious child of the Creator. Not because you are a pop idol. Not because you are a commodity. Not because you are a superstar.
You are loved because you are. Full stop. Nothing you could ever do would make God love you less. Nothing you could ever do would make God love you more.
Pick yourself up, knock the dust off, check that sacred GPS, and walk on.
[Insert Apple Maps joke here]
May the God who loves you more than all of your millions of fans ever will continue to bless and protect you.
Grace and all the good things, Cathleen
Time to get a new biographer Bieber. This one has lost her fucking mind.